*Picking back up on Day 3 of the 21 days of Fasting and Praying by Ruby Gals, vowing to stay consistent this time, I was presented with the fact that it’s been a month since I wrote Day 2. Praise God that His faithfulness in no way mirrors my own.*
Wash me thoroughly from mine iniquity, and cleanse me from my sin.
While I thought about this verse, I thought about being washed and cleansed. If we’re talking about washing and cleansing something it must mean that that particular something was dirty or messy to begin with. Reading this verse, God showed me that in order to be cleansed and washed, and in order to to grow closer to Him I must first admit and confess my current condition. I must admit that I have not “arrived”. I am not as mature in my faith as I’d like to be; I desire growth. I am not spotless or free of iniquity and sin; I desire cleansing.
Asking God earnestly and with a contrite heart to search me and cleanse me, I have been feeling led in particular to love better. Through recent preaching and my own Bible reading, God’s been pressing on me to simply love better.
Simple, right? I’m a Christian. I have the JOY, JOY, JOY, JOY down in my heart!
Sure, but simple doesn’t necessarily mean easy.
It’s a simple concept. When Jesus was asked what the great commandment of the law was, He said this:
Matthew 22: 37-40
Jesus said unto him, Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind. This is the first and great commandment. And the second is like unto it, Thou shalt love thy neighbor as thyself. On these two commandments hang all the law and the prophets.
Love others as you love yourself. It’s a straightforward command, it leaves no room for interpretation or special implementation. You just do it. You just love.
Yet, here I am, on this third day of Ruby Gals’ 21 days of fasting and prayer, confessing that I just don’t wanna.
I’ve recently discovered in myself a competitive nature that I never knew of. I love this side of me, honestly. I bring my A-game to even the smallest competitions. Every win is a big win. Every game or competitive situation is that much more exciting simply because of the change to WIN! High fives and attaboys and good games all around!
However, on the other side of those winning highs and excitements come equally devastating and disappointing losses. All the whooping and hollering comes from the other team. The glow of achievement is beaming from someone else’s smile. It’s not so easy to rejoice in others’ victories at the expense of my own.
When you just don’t wanna love, it becomes quite easy not to. Consistent, unceasing selflessness is not a virtue that comes easy. Easy would be to gather myself up in myself, do right by me, and love only the absolutely most lovable.
But that’s not God’s will. God calls us to love as we love ourselves. Period.
Arise with me, O Souls, and let’s recognize that when seeking God’s will and favor, it can sometimes be found in the most fundamental commands that we aren’t always quick to fulfill.